samson and delilah is a great story because not only is samson dumb strong he’s also just dumb in general possibly the dumbest man on earth. his weird girlfriend asks him like 3 different times how to fuck up his life and he never once thinks “god maybe i shouldn’t answer this at all in fact maybe delilah is out to fuck my shit up” he just gives her a couple bullshit fake answers hoping to shut her up. like incredibly specific fake answers that could not be a coincidence if she proceeded to exactly those things. “oh if i get tied up with 7 new bowstrings i’ll lose my strength” actually i think his answer had to do with bowstrings every time just like in different combinations. i don’t remember anyway he told her ALL THAT HOGWASH and still at the end he STILL told her okay if you cut my hair i just mcfreaking lose it but please don’t do that. guess what she did
samson and delilah is a cautionary tale about how being horny will make you stupid and ruin your life
delilah on the phone with the philistines after the 3rd unsuccessful attempt at rendering samson weak but she’s got a good feeling about this time: hey guys i just talked to samson and he- no, yeah were still together he really didnt do shit about the last couple times we tried to kill him or whatever, idk he doesnt seem to care. speaking of which yeah he just gave me a new weakness i guess he has and this one doesnt have anything to do with being tied up with weird strings so i think it’s the real deal this time? but like will it even matter if it isn’t. he’s gonna keep letting me do this. yeah i can meet you by applebees in like 20 minutes
